Alone

I like to pride myself for always being "busy". I guess it's a trait I got from my mother, somehow always  being surrounded by people, always having something to do. There is always a constant noise- someone there to talk to, a movie to watch, people's problems to hear, whatever it was-it always kept me sufficiently occupied. That is, until today.

Today I was forced to spend time with myself. That sounds so funny, I know. It shouldn't feel awakward I guess because considering I live alone, I spend so much time being "on my own". But this was a different feeling altogether. Today I found myself having lunch alone. I spent about five minutes on my phone in an attempt to distract myself. Across the restaurant, I saw another girl-she was also alone. I realized there was something different about her. I kept staring to see, what was it? What was it about her? Then it hit me- she didn't have a phone near her whatsoever. No distractions. She was completely in the moment, enjoying being by herself. Unlike me, she wasn't constantly checking for messages in an effort to fend off loneliness. She was basking in it! It was then that I put my phone down (admittedly, this was easier to do because my battery was low). I decided at that moment, to spend time with myself. I ate lunch, enjoying bite after bite, savoring the flavors instead of keeping up with social media. When I finished, I sat there, watching other people interact- people came and left and there I sat, alone in my own  thoughts. Later that day I went to the bookstore and found a book I thought was interesting. I spent the rest of my afternoon reading it. When I walked out, I realized night had fallen. I had spent the rest of my day with myself. The phrase "by myself" reduces you to one person, no friends, no plans. It connotates something negative which, if we are honest, can be the best thing for a person. The feeling of spending time with myself was amazing. I found that I could think clearly, because I wasn't worried about other people. There was no one else's noise in my mind but my own. I was able to find some peace, even if it lasted only a few hours. Most importantly, I realized that I actually enoyed spending time with me. Note to self: We should do this more often.

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Comments (5)

  1. stillstanding

    I love my alone time when I can get it. So energizing.

    June 09, 2016
  2. williamwatts

    Your post kept me glued, to the words that flowed so smoothly. I found myself at the edge of my seat, feeling each word melt inside of me. Such emotions, I have not felt in so very long and I agree that we all need to stand back, and shut out the world, if not for just a moment and share some valued time with ourselves. Amazing post. Thank you.

    June 09, 2016
    1. keepyoureyesopen

      thank you! yes, alone time really does the mind good sometimes.

      June 10, 2016
  3. emiliamoore

    Alone time is the majority of my time. I have found that one needs to be careful for what they wish for. I would trade one day for social time for three days of my alone time. My life long friends died or moved away. My children are grown and living their lives. Enlightenment has reached it’s peak and self- assessment has been a yearly event as the years fly past. Loneliness sets in because alone-time is too frequent. Flower garden is constantly growing and changing. Work is my escape from alone-time. Self-improvement has changed to DIY time. Traveling intensifies loneliness. Love has grown and gone. I would trade alone-time for the company of another, whether long or short lived. The soul withers without the company of another. Memories fill the gap as I long for a companion. Be careful for what you wish for.

    June 10, 2016
    1. keepyoureyesopen

      Thank you for the advice. Yes, I really do appreciate time with friends and family. I guess I am always surrounded by them that I take them for granted. Best wishes

      June 10, 2016